Some Things

Well, time for random bitching. Weeee!

The Library Experience

I went to the library on Monday to print off an essay and photocopy two images to attach to it. The essay was due at 5pm and I arrive at the library around 2:30pm. I proceed to the "express" computers so I can just go into my hotmail, access my essay, print it off, and hand it in. No fuss, no muss.

I bring up my essay and because I use Microsoft Works instead of Microsoft Word, I have to go through my essay and reformat a little bit so that everything fits. After that, I hit print, and the computer tells me that there aren't any printers associated with/installed on this computer. Wait, what? These are community computers on a network. That does make sense. Try again, nothing. I ask the girl next to me if she's having problems and, sure enough, she is.

So I go up to the computer help counter and tell the guy that we're having trouble printing. He says he'll be right there. About twenty minutes later, after swapping computers, sighing ever-so-loudly, and wondering what the fark I'm going to do, some other techie sonders over and clicks a couple buttons and says "Wow, that's strange." No, really? After he says that about a dozen times and tells us to re-log in and maybe that will work (no, it won't, dumbass - how is logging into the computer going to magically install a printer?), I walk back over to the desk and ask for floppy disks so we can copy the files to disk and print them on a different network of computers. He says for us to try to log onto a different computer because he doesn't know if he has floppy disks (I found out later there's a big box of them..), so I go do that. Wow, it doesn't work. Go figure! D'oy!

Then he comes and finds me and two girls all frantically trying to print off a paper for five o'clock and tells us he'll just print them off at his main computer on a different printer. What the poop? Why didn't he do that in the first place and then play Mr. Fix-It on the computers? Anyway, I print it off, and by this time, it's 4:20-ish.

I hurry over to the photocopiers to scan the two images, stick 'em to a piece of paper, and hand in the essay. I get to the photocopiers and low-and-behold, they're new! Just installed yesterday! Well super! I stick my card in the reader to get my money, plop the book down, hit scan. Beep. Beep what? Scan. Beep. What the fark. "Adjust the direction handle so that something something I hate you, I'm evil something something." I lift up the lid, move the book, put down the lid, hit scan. Beep. Oh ma gawd. Scan. Beep. Beep beep. It spits out my card. Apparantly I'm wasting the photocopier's time or something. I go to the other batch of photocopiers, they're also new and stupid, they also beep at me. I beep back.

I go over to "Copy Services" and see a lady sitting behind her desk, behind the counter. In a lovely (sarcasm) voice, she says "Can I help you?"

"Yeah, I can't get the photocopiers to work."
"I'm sorry. I'm closed." Well then why did you answer me, you crazy bitch!? "Go over to circulation." Fine.
I go over to circulation. "Oh, you have to go to copy services for tha-"
"NO, she sent me here."
"Oh, really? But I can see her there in her office. Here, let me ge-"
"NO. She sent me here. She's closed. Can you please help me? I'm in a hur-"
"But it's still one minute to five. She shouldn't be closed yet."
Well, guess what? SHE IS! Wait, one minute to five. Beep.
"Look, I'm having a horrible day in this library. Can someone please just help me?"
Enter the one person who actually was helpful on this day of days. She turns around to look at us all and says, "You sound like you've had a bad day. Let me find *dumb weasel man's name* for you."
"THANK you."

So, dumb weasel man walks over. In a very nasal weasely voice, he asks me what I'm having problems with and I tell him. He comes around, walks with me over to the photocopiers. All full. Other copiers. All full. "Well, here, I'll give you your book back and you come find me in a little while," and walks away. WHAT? Are you even serious?

By now, it's about 5:10 and I'm freaking out. I renew the stupid book and rush to my prof's office. Luckily he's still there and, after I ramble my stressful library hell story to him, he sympathizes and takes the essay and tells me to hand the attachments in when I have time.

...I hate the library.

The Bus and The Snow

St. John's recently was hit by about a foot of snow. I don't mind snow that much, as long as it doesn't get in my way. That is not possible in this city. Here, the plows don't know what they're doing. They drive around, plowing major streets into two lanes instead of four, and no one shovels sidewalks. No one.

So, in order to get to my bus, I now have to trek through the arctic tundra for a couple minutes, falling into knee-high foot prints that lead to the main road. Once there, I cross the icky slush and stand on the side of the road to get covered in the icky slush, but also to get dirty looks from cars who have to slow slightly so they don't plow me over.

Once I'm thoroughly covered in brown gunk, the bus arrives approximately ten minutes late and we all pile on. It smells like wet socks, but I guess that's because everyone's socks are wet. Go figure.

While on the bus, I notice there is a new bus pass that I will be forced to partake in next year. It is a magnetic card that you are supposed to just put in front of the scanner, it beeps and lights up green, you sit your ass down. Alas, it never works. It always buzzes angrily, no matter if you're a student or an old women who doesn't understand that this technology isn't from the devil. The bus drivers always let you stand there for four or five tries before they say "sit down". One girl got on and proceeded to scan the card. Buzz. She looks annoyed, but stares at the machine and tries again. Buzz. The bus driver, having dealt with the buzzing the entire ride to the school (probably the reason he was late) tells her to sit down. She doesn't hear him as her entire brain is focusing on somehow making this machine beep. She tries again. Buzz. "It's not working. Sit down please." Laser-eyes at the machine. Swipe. Buzz.

This is where, because I'm sitting at the front of the bus and have been on it for twenty minutes smelling feet and hearing buzz buzz buzz, I crack. "IT'S NOT WORKING!" She jumps, looks over at me, I give her that look like "You're a dumbass". She looks over at the bus driver, he nods and says "sit down." She hurries back and finds a seat while people around me move ever-so-slightly away. Try me. Watch me care.


I'm sure there's much more I could rant about, but I'm slushy and headachey. Beep.

--Jam