Some Sex, No City

Hey peeps and peepettes.

We'll write today's installment on a boy rant, because what post is complete without some sort of boy drama? A boring post, that's what.

The boy I had the amazing time with on Friday was supposed to come to a party with me last night. Ben threw an amazing end of exam bash, and I thought it would be a fun opportunity for him to meet some of my friends and for us to have a great time amongst other people. I had talked to him on Monday and he said he was most likely going to go, and we'd talk Tuesday to figure out when and where to meet and all that jazz.

Tuesday came and went. Nothing from the boy.
Wednesday came and went. Nothing from the boy. Unfortunately, I do not have his number, so I left him some messages on MSN giving him the address and my cell number in case he was coming. The party came and went with no sign whatsoever of the boy. I haven't talked to him since Monday and I have no idea what's going on.

To be perfectly honest, I don't get why someone would purposely lead someone else on. Does it give them kicks to see another person miserable or upset? Then again, he doesn't get to see me upset, so that can't be the reason. Why would he tell me he likes me, say he wanted to go to this party, and then ignore me for three days? If he didn't want to go to the party, if he was not interested in me, then he could have just told me. Just call me up (he has my number) or even message me or email me or anything. It's so rude and vile for someone to blatantly stand someone up. Yeah, I was really hurt. I let myself like a guy who, from all perspectives, came onto me, and this is what happens.

I was talking to Natalie last night because I was very frustrated, and I came to the conclusion that I am going to get to the point where I am so jaded that I simply won't be able to date. Nearly every time I let myself like a guy, this happens, and I don't know how much longer I can take it.

I also realized that the reason it hurt so much is because this is not only with guys. I am realizing that there are only a certain amount of people who have my interests at heart, as I do with others', and that makes me really upset. My true friends are amazing and I could not do without them, but there are not many left. When I find a guy who I think likes me and wants to be more than just friends, it takes me a long time to trust them because this kind of crap happens. I get hurt.

Anyway, this is just a jumbley mess of my emotions. I'm sure after some sleep and booze, I'll be good as new.

--Jam