The Ramblings of the New Shadforth

Howdy, Doodies!

Okay, NO ONE is answering me on MSN tonight! I've messaged like fifteen people! Is my msn broken? Do I have bad breath? Do I have a dead Joan Rivers on my face? Or a live one? What? Tell me!

Ugh, stupid people ignoring me.

Take this!

--Jam


...hahaha, just kidding! I have stuff to talk about.

First off, I love Fran Drescher and Jerry O'Connell. They were both on Ellen today and I think I had several aneurysms from laughing so hard. Fran said something that was so hilarious and so true. She was saying that she was going to go on a date with some guy and he had a Lamborgini. She said that there are only three reasons a guy would own one of those:

1. Nouveau Riche
2. Ladies' Man
3. A small "frmfrm"

LOL I don't know what a frmfrm is, but she said it SO FUNNILY. I want to be her. And then she laughs like she has a squirrel lodged in her throat, and that makes me laugh more. Ohhh boy, I gotsta find me a squirrel and choke on it so I can be half-as-great as she is.

So my party is in two days and I'm so excited! I have enough alcohol to kill a class of kindergarteners, my room is much cleaner because I don't want people to see what a slob I am, and it's just going to be SO great. SO SO SO GREAT! SO^infinity GREAT!

Mmm, Freddie Prinze Jr. is so hot.

Ick, I hate Harveys and now my tummy is grummy. Damn grummy tummy.

I'm meeting a guy tomorrow night. His name's Aiden and he's only 5'2 *tee hee, so cute!*. He seems normal-ish, but he's been telling me that pot saved his life, and has to tell me the story in person because it's apparantly "deep". I think it sounds apparantly "crazy" and "nutbary", but that's just me. He's Pagan, and I'll be honest and say I hardly know what that is. I know it deals with the Earth and nature and stuff *I think*, so I guess it can't be all bad.

Sunday is our second weekly Shadforth family dinner, and it's my turn to buy the wine. The four of us (the three Shadforth sisters, and me, the newest Shadforth lol), alternate on what to make/buy. One makes dessert, one makes an appetizer, one makes dinner, and one brings wine. I got the easy one to start, and I'm going to work my way up to the big stuff *gets nervous*. I bought Piat D'Or, because it's one of the best French Wines I've had, and I think everyone will really enjoy it. Next time around, in early November when it's my turn again, I may splurge on a vintage bottle so that I can impress everyone and get presents for my greatness. For now, French chardonnay is good enough for me.

I've been having so many dreams about becoming a Much VJ. I know that I probably won't get the job, and will be extremely disappointed when I don't, but it's nice to dream about. They need a geek on there, I'm tellin' ya. I'll play the geek card, I'll play the gay card, I'll play the short card, I'll play whatever damn card I need to, to get that position.

*whew* I just smelled an air-freshener up-close to see if it was still working, and oh ya, it's working. I feel dizzy now lol too.. much.. melon..

I'm going to be editing my rants soon and applying to the Hamilton Spectator to see if I can get a weekly column or something like that. I need to add something to my life that adds accomplishment. Otherwise I may throw myself off a building or lick an electrical socket.

What a way to go.

--Bzzzzzzt

--I mean, Jam