September

How is it possible that September is almost over? It feels like I just left Toronto, left my nightmare of banking every morning, living monotony. Yet, here I am, in St. John's, going to school full-time and loving life.

I hate to make this another boy post, but I'm going to, so deal with it, or go read the news at CNN. I promise this is more interesting, since those political debates were just riveting.

The guy and I have been spending a fair bit of time together. We went to a party together, we went for dinner, and unless it's supremely and solely in my brain, friendship is finally developing into something new and exciting, as I was hoping. I think it's almost hard for it not to. We have so much in common and can talk about anything for hours. It's terrific to meet someone like that, let alone someone you're attracted to, someone who has a plan that might fit into yours.

Whether I wind up with this guy or not, I've learned more about myself than I ever thought I could from someone else in such a short period of time. His goals and his interests and his aspirations--they've changed the way I think about dating. I know now that there is someone out there for me, whether it's him or not, who is ambitious and intelligent and fits my jigsaw piece of a self in so many ways, not just one or two (if that makes any sort of sense). I mean, not to belittle the fact that I would love it if he was that piece because that would make life that much simpler, however on a general level, it's nice to know that he, and others like him, are out there in the world. Also not to say I didn't find something in every guy I've dated up until now; actually saying they each had something, but the "light" is finally showing me that someone might have everything.

It's a nice evening, don't you think?

--Jam

Kay, on a giddy note, for my gurlz who want some specifics, we went to a party and got totally drunk and he flirted with me hardcore, or so it seemed, and we went for dinner the next day. Fingers and toes crossed. Got it?

...squeeeee!

The Wants

I want to meet Uma Therman.

I want my friend Heather to understand that Uma is gorgeous, therefore when people say she looks like Uma, they're saying "you look like a gorgeous blonde Hollywood actress."

I want to meet a guy that I can be romantic with, and he appreciates it.

I want to meet a guy who wants to be romantic back.

I want a 4.0 GPA.

I want my loans to come in so I can afford to buy textbooks.

I want to meet someone who can beat me at DDR who is not Heidi.

I want a kitty named Friday.

I want to have a husband who wants a kitty named Friday.

I want to have a husband, period.

I want a pina colada. Every day.

I want a house in Barbados that overlooks the ocean. Well, any warm island country really. (Husband in this one too would be great.)

I want a washboard stomach.

I want to know how the hell that happens because Jebus I have tried.

I want my scruff to come in normally, instead of being all patchy on my cheeks. What is that about anyway?

I want to have a bestseller.

I want ten bestsellers, actually.

I want to have the urge and the time to write a bestseller.

I want my mom to say that she's proud of me for going to school and that she supports me.

She finally did.

--Jam is happy

Srsly

Kay peeps. Serious news today.

Just kidding! My life's not important enough to be news. More like a newsletter that you get in the mail and really don't want about an old tree about to be cut down in a neighbourhood you don't live in, so you don't read it and it ends up in the recycle bin next to the Dominion flyer and the old phone book. Like that.

1. I'm so sick, so sick, of people who refuse to care about spelling and grammar. Do people really not care that they have no idea how to use their own language? I mean, I know I've talked about it before. Many times. Over and over. However, I just don't understand it. I mean, I dislike it when people are relatively uninformed about politics, general issues that should concern them, but a language, to me, is so much more important. It's such disgusting ignorance when a person misuses the very essence of how that person communicates to anyone. Baffling.

2. Still being friends with the guy. It's just so fantastic being around him. Different than other guys I've dated in the past. It's so easy and relaxed and fun. We flirt, ever-so-slightly, back and forth, and I can small inclinations that he's thinking the same as me, that he likes me too, though I'm actually really afraid that if (when) I tell him my feelings for him that he won't feel the same. I guess I'm setting myself up for rejection, but I feel like I can't control this one. I mean, every married person once took a risk with the person they're with, right? I want Liz's opinion on this--do you still read my blog? If so, write me and tell me what I should be thinking or something.

3. If anyone else is a Blog Buddy with Ross Mathews (aka Ross the Intern), let me know! I've become such a huge fan of his--I even comment on his blog from time to time. Once he replied. Just to me!

I think we're BFF's. Obvsly.

--Jam

Two Months, Less a Day

Good morning, kids and kidettes!

As I am slowly letting go of Jam's Blog, I have also been slowly preparing the next blog, so don't worry, I'll get back into it eventually. I'm hoping to be starting into video blogs instead of doing all text so that you can see my beautiful face, because we all know that's why you read my blog. (All three of you, haha.)

So, I do have a dilemma and I'd like some advice. What happens when you meet someone (in my case, a gay male) who you become friends with, quite easily as a matter of fact, and each time you see this new friend, you become increasingly attracted to the person? I met him innocently enough and we bonded quickly, realizing that we have a lot in common. He continuously mentions in conversation that he doesn't want to date right now, not directed at me but in a general sense, and talks of "when he starts dating again" what he'll do differently.

We have so much in common, it's kind of sick. If I were to ask for certain qualities in a guy, he has near all of them, if not every one. Therefore, I have no idea what to do. I could continue to just try to stay friends, but then I might regret not asking him out, especially when he meets a guy. However, if I ask him out and it doesn't work out, I might lose a friendship with a great person.

Your turn: Advice please!

--Jam with a dilemma