The Old

Evenin'.

(Why is it that even though it is obviously night and not evening, I have to say good evening, because if I said good night I'd actually be saying goodbye? But, if I were to say good morning or good afternoon, that is not necessarily a goodbye... damn english)

So I practically cried today. My wonderful couple, Meredith and Gretchen, finally met their end on The Amazing Race tonight. I'm so deeply saddened that I could scream, and I wish that there was some way I could fix it, but I know there isn't. It's just so unfortunate that they didn't look for an earlier connecting flight, but oh well.

In a way Gretchen reminds me of my two grandmothers, and how much I miss them; one because she passed away in 2000 and one because she lives in Brantford and isn't the same as she used to be. She's gotten old and become rather senile and hard-to-handle. Gretchen, although she was whiney at times, encompassed everything that I revel in everytime I think of my grandmas. I wish there was some way I could experience the same feeling I used to get when I stayed over at my grandma's house or she baked me something or we went for walks or we built something.

I'm terrified of growing old. These feelings will become more and more foreign to me and eventually they won't exist. The elderly people in my life will pass away with my juvenescence, and I'll only be left with an array of different emotions, until those emotions and all others are no more.

If your grandma lives near you, go give her a hug or give her a flower or talk to her for an hour. They won't always be there, and neither will you.

--Jam